Day Twenty-Eight   /   lettering by Joe Hollier

Jessica Walsh

Did you see Timothy today?
Yep!

What did y’all do together?
Tim met me near my office for a quick coffee at a place called Ports. I have a day packed with meetings, and I really appreciate how accommodating he is being with my schedule.

portscoffee-new

Did anything interesting happen?
Tim is reading a manuscript for a book jacket design he is working on. The topic is creative duos, and why creativity works best in pairs rather than as a single person or in large groups. I have always loved to read, so I appreciate that Tim does as well. After coffee, Tim walked me back to my studio. He kissed me goodbye when he dropped me off at my office.

Did you learn anything new about Timothy?
Tim brought up how “American” he felt compared to me, and how I seem much more European. I never thought about this before, since I am not so interested in these kinds of labels. Personally, what I think defines someone is their character, not where they are born or their religion. It’s how they treat people, their passions and interests, their goals and ambitions. Tim has great character. He is passionate, motivated, interested, and he has a big heart. Sure, he has his problems and issues, but at least he can call himself out on his own bullshit and laugh about it. I think the only people to laugh at are those who can’t laugh at themselves.

Did you learn anything new about yourself?
Tim called me an “enigma” today for the third time! I’ve been called this by family members and past boyfriends before. Even my own therapist has called me an enigma. The Meyers-Briggs personality indicator called me an enigma! Why do people think I am so complicated when I feel so simple? I talked about this with a friend of mine. She told me to not take it personally, that being an enigma is basically the definition of being a woman. Perhaps it’s not a bad thing to not be so easily defined.

How do you feel about this relationship/project right now?
Someone once said that the best kind of relationship is one where you “talk like best friends, play like children, argue like husband and wife, and protect each other like brother and sister.” Whether or not Tim and I work out romantically, I feel lucky to have this with Tim. Today we talked about how no matter what happens, we’ll be forever linked through this crazy experiment.

bestfriends-3

Is there anything that you want to do differently?
Not today. Things are good.

Additional comments?
I drank decaf coffee today, but it just wasn’t the same. I bought a croissant, but realized it was wheat, so I resisted eating it. This is tough. However, it’s day three of healthy living and still no headaches! #tradeoffs

Timothy Goodman

Did you see Jessica today?
Yep.

What did y’all do together?
We met for coffee around 3 PM by her studio.

Did anything interesting happen?
Not particularly. It was, however, the first time we kissed in public. As we had coffee, I could sense that she wanted me to be affectionate with her. While I’ve had commitment issues the last couple years, I’ve never been scared of PDA. I will hold hands and kiss any girl I’m dating in public. I can actually go too far at times, turning my PDA into TMI.

TIM

But this is different. This is Jessie. This is not the same. Usually, you don’t know these kind of things when you’re getting to know somebody. But because I already know her so well, I know how much everything means to her. That’s what’s undermining me. I’m still nervous about leading her on too much right now.

Did you learn anything new about Jessica?
She told me that she’s been grinding her teeth. I used to do that years ago, and I’d wake up with massive headaches. It was awful. I sent her an article about it today.

Did you learn anything new about yourself?
We ran into my friend Wyatt while we were sitting in front of the coffee shop. Have you ever felt like someone knew you were up to something, even if you really weren’t? Like, I knew that he knew that I knew that he knew something was going on. It was hilarious.

How do you feel about this relationship/project right now?
I’m designing a book cover for a book on creativity and pairs. Essentially it explains how the “lone genius” is a myth, and that two people working together is better than an individual or three people. It goes on to explain how pairs can challenge and support each other because they can only really lean on each other; there are no short cuts. A three-legged table will hold up just fine, but two legs can run.

Legs_small

It also explains that two people who co-create something will forever be linked. Studies that have been performed indicate that it takes 25 to 30 hours for people to really get to “see” one another for the people they are. It makes me wonder about Jessie and me, and how much we really “see” each other after 28 days. I feel a real bond with her right now. We’ve been through a lot. No matter what happens in the next 12 days, I know we’ll be connected forever because of this experience. I’m very happy, she’s my best friend right now.

Is there anything that you want to do differently?
Although I can be resistant about things, I really feel like I’m going with the flow. I’m giving this a chance. I’m not freaking out or feeling a need to run away.

Additional comments?
I talked to my grandmother tonight. My grandparents have been together for 56 years. If there’s ever been hope for me to make a relationship work, it’s the standard that those two have set. Grams told me that a relationship is about pushing through, not looking for a way out. Then she asked me if it’ll be hard after I no longer have to see Jessica everyday. It felt like a hit in my gut. I couldn’t answer her.