Day Twenty-Nine   /   lettering by Si Scott

Jessica Walsh

Did you see Timothy today?
Yes.

What did y’all do together?
Tim and I both taught our last class of the semester at SVA.

Did anything interesting happen?
We each passed out cards in our respective classes. The cards asked whether the student was single or in a relationship, and why. We collected the cards and were touched by their awesome and uninhibited responses.

There were a few like this that made me laugh:
beinginarelationship1

And there were a few like this that made me yearn for love:
beinginarelationship2-revised

What I love about art/design students is that the realities of working in the “real world” haven’t diluted their ideas and imaginations yet. They are young, but they’re so much more open and honest than many other people. I think age is just an illusion. Some of the youngest people I know are the oldest at heart, and some of the oldest have been the youngest.

Did you learn anything new about Timothy?
Throughout our friendship, Tim has always enjoyed expressing his dating escapades to me. I’ve always poked fun of him, comparing him to a little kid in a candy shop. He gets so excited about all the possibilities of different women, he can’t focus long enough to figure out what he wants. Tonight, Tim was boasting about a few girls he dated before the experiment who have been messaging him recently. He also told me about a beautiful girl he ran into on the street who wanted to meet up with him. For the first time, all this bragging bothered me.

In therapy, we talked about how this desire for attention can stem from insecurity or low self-esteem. Constant attention provides constant reassurance that we are wanted or loved. I think deep down, no matter how confident we appear, we’re all a little insecure. We want to feel accepted and understood on some level. Some of us seek this through romance, others through family or friendships, and others with work status and merits.

Did you learn anything new about yourself?
One of my main goals is to find a way to help or touch people through my work. I’ve been unsure whether or not I want to teach next year since it’s so time consuming. And I was a little insecure about whether I was making a difference. However, after my class, many of the students gave me gifts or came up to thank me for the semester. It gave me the encouragement to stick with it. Even if I only help out a few students a year, I think it’s worth it!

How do you feel about this relationship/project right now?
After class, my sister came over my place for a glass of wine. I asked her to fill out one of our cards for the project. She wrote “I’m honestly too cool for any guy to handle.” I had to laugh.

Is there anything that you want to do differently?
Throughout my childhood, my sister and I would fight like cats and dogs. We’d argue over everything: attention from my parents, who was better at this or that, and her constant theft of my clothes. We were complete opposites in almost every way. My mom would always say that one day we’d move past it all, and we’d share one of the most meaningful relationships of our lives. I thought this was my mom being overly sentimental.

JessLaur3

A few years ago Lauren moved a few blocks from me, and we’ve grown incredibly close. I’ve finally understood the depth of this “sisterly bond” I always heard so much about. While we have different personalities and different ways of expressing ourselves, I’ve come to realize that we’re similar in so many ways. She’s there for me anytime I need her. She is one of my biggest supporters and closest friends. We grew up together, so she understands me in ways that no one else can. While she continues to use my closet as her own personal cost-free department store, I’ve come to realize how meaningless a few pieces of clothing are in the bigger picture.

Additional comments?
This makes me think about my relationship with Tim. While we’re opposites in almost every way, I think deep down there are many similarities. However differently we may approach something, I think we want the best for each other.

Timothy Goodman

Did you see Jessica today?
Yes.

What did y’all do together?
Our weekly after class “hummus club” meeting with our buddy Michael. My students rocked it out tonight. However, it was our last class this year, so no more hummus until September.

Over the weekend we made a set of cards that we passed out to our design students tonight. The cards asked to select an option about being single or being in a relationship. We got some amazing responses back. I always tell them that there are no “rules” to this thing, that it’s important for them to play and work with the truth in their work. College students are usually not afraid to express themselves, and I wasn’t let down. Here’s a few of them:

Did anything interesting happen?
Not really. I feel like we’re in that funny moment when we’re not really sure if we should kiss when we see each other. It’s probably my fault.

Did you learn anything new about Jessica?
There are girls you date, and there are girls you marry. Jessie is definitely a girl you marry. I think Jessie won’t date a guy she feels like is a waste of her time. There needs to be a real possibility for something more. I am much more open to dating someone who I know I don’t want to marry. I have no qualms about dating a girl who only checks some of my boxes, as long as there a couple that are definitive. But we all have that infamous internal wish list!

Girls

I did a little online research, and found this funny article from the Huffington Post, entitled 10 Types of Women That Men Do Not Want to Marry. So true.

Did you learn anything new about yourself?
If Jessie really is “marriage material,” can I handle that realization? Am I really ready for a girl like that? What do I do if I start getting nervous about this relationship? Wait, am I nervous now? How do I manage that and still be sincere with her? What if I screw it all up? Maybe it’s actually meant to be screwed up? What’s going to happen next? Why am I over-thinking this so much? Does she know I’m over-thinking this? Am I possibly falling for her?

How do you feel about this relationship/project right now?
I was once friends with an older gentleman named Jim. I could write a book on this guy. Anyway, he always had all these phrases he’d repeat over and over. This situation is reminding me of something he used to always say to me: “A man chases a woman until she catches him.” However, I haven’t been chasing Jessie, so why do I still feel “caught?”

Is there anything that you want to do differently?
She gave me some attitude tonight because I didn’t remember her entire work schedule. Sorry, Jessie, but I have a busy work schedule, too. What I loved about our friendship is that we never talked about design or our work. It was very refreshing to me. Now, inevitably, we talk about it a lot.

Additional comments?
Big thanks to all the SVA students who contributed, along with our friends Julia Hoffmann, Luke Hayman, John Fulbrook, and Michael Freimuth for letting us pass these out in your classes!